Saturday, October 18, 2008

Please send me anything but signals that are mixed

I've been home for the weekend, and i cannot tell you how great it feels. I go back tomorrow and don't get me wrong i can't wait to get back to Marist and live that life. Somehow though nothing can be coming back home. That saying home is where the heart is, well it is true. I love the feeling of autumn at my house, the way its decorated, smells, feels. I love it. It was such a relaxing break. I got to be with Laur all weekend which i think was good for the both of us. My mind has been polluted with thoughts of him though...

Last time we talked...we barley even talked and that was on wednesday night. He was studying and i was tired and went upstairs. He asked me where i was going and why i was going up to my room; so you'd think that would be a good thing right? Well being that my roommate was gone and he knew it i kinda automatically assumed he would come up to my room eventually. Nope he didn't. I mean he probably knew i was going to bed, seeing as i'm always with them til the crack of dawn, but we haven't talked since that incident. That scares me. My friends all say that it is not a big deal at all. But i mean come on who wouldnt be freaking out just a little because the boy your always kinda with alot was't trying to contact you?

Mixed signals suck. I don't know what to think anymore. Actually I'm trying to stay very positive and am hoping that tomorrow things will just go back to the happy way they were before the other night. Wow now that i see my thoughts written down and the worrys i had i suppose i was worrying for nothing. I know i seem so attatched but it's not even attatched, its just this feeling. How it's all right and how everything worked out so well. I can't explain it but it's like it all just clicked so well so fast.

Tomorrow is going to be a good day, I know it. I can feel it. =)

night love you all

X girls i cannot wait until Jill's birthday weekend, Reunion time since summer!

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